am i crazy?

or has my mother and fiancée conspired against me? j assumes that i tell my mother EVERYTHANG about us. he has no idea of what a mother/daughter relationship is. and what he assumes, he gets completely wrong. this time he set me up and i walked right in to the trap. so now i'm the one at fault... again. for our wedding in august we decided for the 2 of us to go to jamaica to get married. he was gonna pay off his share of the trip by today (well, wednesday, but he needed an extension) AND he's still short. (quick note: back in february, i put down the deposit and then some, so my share's all paid off.) and being that my mom is my landlord, i asked her if i could defer the rent 'til next pay period so we could finish payin' for the trip. of course she obliged, but not without plenty of words about triflin' men who allow their women to carry them until they (the women) are in debt. i did NOT need to hear all that from her. what's worse, when i told j what she said, he threw it back in my face that i let her in our business too much! of course i told her why i needed to hold off on the rent, duh! he was the one who suggested it! wow! it's so nice and convenient for me to be close to my mother when it suits him, but every other time, she's meddling in our business. and i talk to her too much. who else am i gonna talk to?!? (sigh) i just spent the last 20 minutes of my life tryin to explain the dynamics of the mother/daughter relationship. he says he's over on his cell phone minutes. oh my wasted breath. his lack of respect for my mother and our relationship is wearin' on my last nerve. i am so tired of defendin' the fact that i actually talk to the people in my life, while he goes about his like a lone ranger. yeah, what i lack in numbers of relationships he lacks in depth. how do we recover from this? i love him so. i want this to work. i'm willing to try anything. i've even redefined my outlook for our marriage. i used to say we needed to compromise, each of us giving way to the other from time to time. i now think it's all about striking a balance. when one is "heavy" the other becomes "light" for balance in the relationship. being the only one to strike the balance is gettin old real fast. i'm so afraid that this strategy is going to fail because i'm the only one putting it to practice... what are we gonna do?